It’s not here! It’s here! It’s false patriotism! It’s real patriotism! I support gun control! I don’t support gun control! I support doubling the cap gains tax! I don’t support doubling the cap gains tax!
And, of course, the false patriotism that I, Barack Obama, so derided to my liberal base as the basis for all those flag lapel pins — well, now I’m wearing one, too!
Never in my life have I seen someone flip-flop so violently and so quickly. I don’t even know if Obama knows what he stands for anymore. We do have his voting record, though — the most liberal in the Senate. Which should give you a clue where his true sympathies lie, my fellow “bitter” Americans (but whatever you do, sayeth Obama, don’t cling to your wallet when it comes to giving me money).
So now Obama tries to take the center, flip on the last issue — Iraq (mark my words, it’s coming, he will flip on his Iraq position after his visit there) — and then it’s a contest between the young, hip Obama and…that old guy over there.
Never mind that the old guy has more experience in his little finger that Obama has in a lifetime of wheeling and deal-cutting with the likes of Jeremiah Wright. Never mind that. He’s hip. It’s hip to like Obama. And we, as Americans, as the idiots we are, have a duty to elect people because we think they’re “hip”.
After all, the youth of America supports Obama overwhelmingly, and as we all know, kids are always right about this kind of stuff, aren’t they?