All Your Base Are Belong To Us — The Kip Lange Homepage

I can see some of you, sitting there, saying to yourselves, “Hey, Kip, what the hell do you do for fun, besides fiddling with gadgets?”

I’ll tell you what I do. First I strip down to my underwear. Then I take a searching inventory of monkeys. Next, I bow down to a giant poster that looks like this:

I then rush to my computer, type
http://www.vastrightwingconspiracy.org/condiishot/
After this, I go to a nearby mirror, and repeat, “Nancy Pelosi wears a thong!” eight times, while holding back the urge to vomit (as many of you may know, Nancy Pelosi has caused me to projectile vomit several times; this is indeed a great problem and has led to me blocking C-SPAN on my TV).

Then I concentrate very hard, turn around, look over my left shoulder in the mirror, and wait very carefully for the face of Rudy Giuliani to materialize.

So there.

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Right. Let me try to be brief about this. First, the iPhone doesn’t seem to want to ever connect to YouTube when you’re using a wireless network. Safari, the web browser, works just fine, but not YouTube. As does everything else, as far as I know. So if you can’t get at YouTube, trying going through the regular (and slow) AT&T “EDGE” service.

Now, if it’s not even working through that, you can try two things. First, give the iPhone a hard boot by holding the power button on top down until you get the red “Power Off” slide on the front. Power off, and start it up again (you’ll see the Apple logo if you did it right).

The other option is to “restore” the phone in iTunes. It’s not as scary as it sounds. Everything will re-sync. Make sure you don’t restore to a backup; restore it from scratch. That oughtta work.

In the meantime, hopefully we’ll get an update that will let wireless networks work better with the iPhone YouTube option. Or perhaps some which is actually useful, like a Flash player for all that video you can’t see everywhere except YouTube. Thppthh.

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…I’m feeling so upset, although I’m so tired, I’ll have another cigarette — and curse Sir Walter Raleigh, he was such a stupid git…

Pardon the lyrics. But I am tired. I bet a lot of you who remember the ol’ Kip from back in my college days wonders, “Why has Kip stopped writing interesting things? Why is he writing all this bland crap about cleaning lasers and stuff?”

The answer is simple. I don’t want to post a divisive opinion or get into detail about any hijinks I’ve gotten into, because all a prospective employer would have to do is type “Kip Lange” or “Kip Lang” or whatever into a browser and *pop* up comes my blog, and suddenly I don’t get hired because they read about that time with the monkeys, the water-slide, and the KY Jelly, you know?

But dammit, I am going to do some more interesting writing. Possibly under a pen-name under a freely-hosted blog. I’ll let anyone interested know if I do it, so you can follow the rants that once defined my writing…

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Right, so the iPhone has been working great, especially plugged into my wireless network. But for some reason it was being cludgy with me, timing out on weather forecasts, stupid things like that. So I figured I’d give it a restore.

So, just let me say for the record, Apple is frigging awesome. The restore took probably less than ten minutes, and then I was easily able to sync the phone back to my custom settings.

It works. Don’t be afraid to restore your iPhone if you want to make sure it’s running right. Just make sure you’ve synched it through iTunes before you do it, so you can get everything back the way you want it.

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